Monthly Archives: May 2022

FIVE REASONS NOT TO VOTE REPUBLICAN

If you live in Texas, these are some of the Republicans you should NOT vote for.
  1. THEY LIE: The lies did not begin with Trump, they merely achieved a new level of acceptability and viability under the shadow and impetus of the Republican’s Liar-in-Chief.
  2.  THEY CARE ABOUT GUNS MORE THAN CHILDREN’S LIVES. If you need me to flesh this one out, you have not been following the news. How many more mass shootings will it take—how many more children’s lives must be sacrificed—before Republicans see that allowing guns in the wrong hands—or obstructing laws that prevent free access to guns— is tacitly abetting and supporting these horrendous attacks? The Uvalde shooter obtained his two AK-15’s legally under Federal and Texas state laws.
  3. THEY TRIED TO OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. The evidence has already emerged, and it is heartbreakingly clear, that January 6th was not a spontaneous protest of enraged Americans, but a conspiracy of Republican leaders in the White House and Congress to overthrow the duly elected President of the United States and replace him with the man who actually lost the 2020 election. The plan, had Vice President Pence not refused to participate, would have substituted separate slates of Trump electors for those electors actually won by Joe Biden. Any way you measure it, it was a failed coup. 
  4. THEIR VISION IS FIXED FIRMLY ON THE PAST. If left to their own devices, Republicans would turn back the clock to when women could not make decisions about their own bodies, blacks could not protest their subservient place in American life without fearing for their lives, and middle-class Americans would peacefully accept that their rights, livelihoods and comforts were determined by the noblesse oblige of the upper, ruling class. 
  5. THIS IS NOT YOUR FATHER’S REPUBLICAN PARTY. Today’s Republican party, with notable exceptions, is not the political party your father once voted for. That was a party of financial vigilance, extreme patriotism and a dedication to law and order. By cloaking themselves in the American flag and a distorted view of the American Constitution, today’s Republicans pervert the very principles they once espoused. For these Republicans, Law and Order matters up until the moment Capital police officers stand in their way. Patriotism matters up until the moment a disgraced ex-president sends them to attack the seat of their government. And any pretense of financial vigilance went out the window with Trump’s tax bill, which mostly benefitted the wealthy and ignored those most needy in our American enterprise.  

There are countless reasons why you should not vote Republican in the next election, or any following election, until this nest of liars, sycophants and lawbreakers is broken up and true Republicans return to take back their party. 

One only hopes our democracy can survive until that time.

ME AND THE BOYS

The Supremes

Me and the boys were sitting around the Supreme Court the other day talking about you girls. Of course, when I say “the boys,” I also include our group’s honorary member, Amy Coney Barrett, who may not share our gender, but is every bit as fanatical, hard-assed and, yes, manly when it comes to stamping out abortion and a woman’s right to choose.

In fact, it was Amy who declared a woman may have a right to choose her shoes and gloves, even if they don’t match, but not the right to decline carrying a fetus for nine months. That right is reserved for the father of the fetus, whose rights also include choosing not to wear a condom. 

Yes, we know that Roe V. Wade was established precedent and law of the land for over 50 years, but what the hay, it’s never too late to put women in their place. Or back in their place, as the case may be.

Also never too late to forget all the lies we told Senators during our confirmation hearings. If you go back and view the videos of those hearings, you will observe me and the boys crossing our fingers when certain questions were asked. 

But don’t think we had an easy time making this decision. A few of the girls in the court, especially that Bronx spitfire Sonia, tried to get us sidetracked. They argued that the men who deposited their seed in these criminal women should also be imprisoned, too. Either that or have their balls cut off.

You can bet me and the boys had our legs crossed during most of her argument.

I know some of you might say a woman should have the right to abort her child in cases of incest and rape. “Not our problem,” Justice Thomas said at our meeting, “we already have laws covering rape and incest, and unless women are the ones committing rape or incest, I don’t see any need for us to get involved.”

Some of you may have forgotten that Judge Thomas, a.k.a. Long Dong Silver, was always quick with a judicial bon mot.